Some Pet Hates

You're one of those glass-half-empty people, whereas I'm more of a glass-half-full person.

 Let's get this straight! Half a glass is exactly half a glass, the qualifiers 'full' and 'empty' are utterly redundant. If anyone uses the glass-half-empty or glass-half-full identifiers they are actually saying, "I lack the wit or originality to do anything but trot out threadbare cliches."

Which came first, the chicken or the egg?

 Dinosaurs were laying eggs long before the evolution of chickendom - the egg preceded the chicken by millions of years.

The politics of envy.

 The zebra does not envy the pack of hyenas feasting on the corpse of its brother.